: This post was written on 18/03/2013: 06:42 PM
: And i said what i wanted to say on Wednesday, May 22, 2013 6:18:00 AM
: I met her in person on 16/8/14: 12:07 PM, the craziest thing I've ever done in my life!
They say I am crazy
'cause I am in love with the crazy utopia. "Crazy Utopia" could be a
person or her, obviously her, thoughts or even her existence. Each day i born
new and likewise my love for her is new. I know her for the past five years and
i am in love with her from that very point of time whence the "past five
years" started. I've decided a myriads and myriads of times not to think
of her ever and for never. But, I still keep thinking of her. I, personally,
maintain a very secret creed that hails the uncertainty of time. She's a proponent of Crazy Utopia and
she's a crazy Utopian too. I feel great whenever i think of her, not just because
that I love her, but for every greatness she had given me anonymously. She even
doesn't know it. Everything happened accidentally all in a fine morning. She is
the all cause of my writing and thinking and I wonder what would I have done if
I hadn't met her.
Yeah, I believe in Time
and Uncertainty 'cause everything happens to me like so.
I feel no shame in
writing her again and again. (They again say, you'll become immortal if a writer is in love with you)
To be sincere, I know
that I haven't ever loved anyone like that and she has build a great wall
before me, that I may not see any other Beauty of soul and life. I am caged
with in the Beauty of her Love and soul. If that's a curse, I love it!
I am an Utopian who
Crazily fell in love with another Utopian.
She is a free bird, soaring in the endless azure sky. She let herself go, no strings holding her back, from a world that wouldn't accept her. She didn't want to wallow in self pity, drown herself in the misery. She wanted to be happy. She didn't need a world that ceased to exist for her.
ReplyDeleteIn the darkness, a ray of sunshine reached out to her. Her cynical self turned away but the soothing hand pulled her out of her fantasy world. His smile brought her back to life. A loving touch, his honey coloured eyes that burned with intense love. His presense sustained her, she thrived on his love. She soared across the skies with her love by her side, not alone.
Too late she knew that she was never alone, loneliness was never her ally. The one who loved her while she was too busy in her own fantasies and troubles, never abandoned her. He was always there, next to her, but she never noticed.
Now, she was encased in the feathers of her loved one, in her safe haven. He was still next to her. A solitary tear traced a path on his face.
"I am happy for you," he whispered, an invisible part of her being. He was always there, she never saw him. She parted her lips and a soft sorry escaped them. She turned back to her love and huddled in his warmth.
He said, "There is a pleasure in loving someone who doesn't love you back."
- Dewdrop :)
“I have a story, from the past to present, to tell u,” he said. “But…” he said “it was pretty long ago I locked my heart and threw the key somewhere in the wilderness. And, now, I don’t remember where it was. Did you get that key? it will help me to open my heart where I chained both the rage and serenity with love. Have you come here with the key to open my heart?”
DeleteShe smiled. He saw the sun hiding behind the clouds, for his rays couldn’t conquer the greatness of her heart and soul. Her vivid eyes were glistening like an Even Star.He felt that the whole universe paused its pace, while his soul jumped to the zenith of vivacity.
Words started to clutch his tongue, soul began to dance like a crazy utopian. Before he could say something, she stretched out her hand with the key to open his heart. And the heart said “In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”
He kissed with an everlasting love. A Dewdrop blossomed with new life and hope.
"But.."
DeleteHer lips quivered, feelings clouded her mind. She loved him dearly and wouldn't do anything to give him up, his love, his care. When he came into her life, she was reborn, a new energy coursing through her veins. Every day started with his presence, his warmth. His hug that protected her, she felt at home. His insane possessivenes that made him keep her close. She couldn't even consider leaving him. Her existance revolved around him. She dreamt up a world that consisted of only both of them. She painted her life in his colours, bright and happy.
And now, after all this time, he comes into my life, the invisible part of my being. He kissed her, giving her new life and hope, but she slowly pushed him away. She didn't want a new life, she was happy with her life. A shadow of despair crossed his face, and she was shattered. She didn't want to hurt him, he who has always been there for her. She just wanted him to be there for her, as her friend. She took his fist in her hand, and slowly pried open his hand. She kept the key in his hand and a beautiful smile crossed her face.
"Keep it with you. You'll find your princess someday. If you're caged in my love, you wouldn't find her. Let yourself go, live your life."
With those words, she took her hands out of his grasp and ran away into the distance with her loved one, her melodious laugh still echoing in the air. She faded into the distance until he could see her no more.
-Dewdrop :)
someone from the mist laughed at him. it was his self. he threw the key unto the mist from where the memories take the form of loved ones. he didn't want to open his heart again because he said what he wanted to say. the sound of his soul that he hid behind somewhere in the secret corners of the heart finally, at least, found a resting place. he kept that with himself ever since he met her.
Deleteat least, he succeeded in sharing his memory with her.
a world with out her is not possible for him. all his life he lived in her love. he felt that the whole universe was falling upon him.
he ran after her through the mist. she was her breath, life giving soul. he wasn't ready to miss her like that. he will live and love her until his death.
whatever thoughts made her to say like that fought him on the way. he fought well and won over them. she was the delectable princess set apart for him. and she is.
At every corner, she glimpsed him. Through the mist, she saw his figure, looking at her, the love in his eyes never fading. She tightened her grip on 'his' hand, her love, and glanced back. Sometimes she wonders, was it true? What he believed in. Whether she was his princess. But, she lost that moment. And she lived in her present, and the past, a mirage. Nothing could change her love for 'him'. She looked into 'his' eyes and all her inhibitions disappeared. She didn't hear the soft crunch of leaves behind her. She was too occupied with her love, her beliefs, with 'him'. She didn't see him steal glances at her. And sometimes, he lost her again, in the mist, in the blur, in the obscurity. But he always found her, for his love for her burned in his heart, a bright flame. She gave him the key to his freedom, but he flung it away. He chose his way of life, he wanted to chase her forever. He would never give up. His incessant pursuit fascinated her, his yearning for her. She knew not how he could love someone he has never seen, never known. It was a kind of love she had never seen before, something she couldn't comprehend. Was it love? Or just a fantasy? Was it a telepathic connection between two souls? Or just his wishes, dreams reflected in a pool of his thoughts?
ReplyDeleteUnanswered questions that floated in her mind, that perplexed her. For now, she chose not to think about it, as 'he' looked into her eyes with unspeakable love and she got lost in that abyss. She knew that she found all that she ever wanted in 'him', eternal happiness. She would never leave 'him' for anything in the world. 'He' was her world, a beacon of hope in her life. They loved each other with an intensity that could move mountains, that could make the impossible seem possible. And that was all she wanted. She closed her eyes and drifted away...
- Dewdrop
The love for her burned his heart; a bright flame brightened the earth like never. She saw the beauty of soul and life with inordinate degree of excellence. Mist was a camouflage where her thoughts and fears lazed. Why did she run away from his innocent love? Was she afraid of something? Did her fears and perplexities force her to doubt his love? Was she confused with reality and fantasy? Did she compare his love for fantasy, like the rage of Don Quixote? For a moment, he was lost in thoughts. But, then, he saw her waning in to the thick mist where she thought she could just ease her contemplations and leave him like zilch.
DeleteHis love for her was originated in the quintessence of his soul that already unified with hers, and how can she just run away like that? When the mist was vapored in to dewdrops, she realized her love for him. Her eyes were opened and the fire in his eyes and heart was transferred into hers. He said, “My love, all your fears were in vain. I loved you from my realities, imperfections, fears, and perplexities too, but I won over them. My love for you was not a fantasy. All the fantasies that the human kind was accustomed with were created for momentary satisfaction. Above all, how could I live all those years in fantasy thinking of you? My love for you is real like the precious life you are gifted with. Words are incompetent for my feelings and how I fell in love with you. I do wonder that what makes me to love you unconditionally. Of course, I have seen you. And know you.”
“Dear, you didn’t hear the soft crunch of leaves behind you” he said. He followed her ever since he met her. He went to deserts after her. When she wafted to the playground of Europe, he was also there. When she was in Malabar, he was there. When she was in Trivandrum, he was also there. She never escaped from his burning eyes of love for her.
Tears from his eyes slipped down through his cheeks and when it touched the earth, it transformed into dewdrops, the nectar of everlasting love.
She closed her eyes. The mist vapored into dewdrops transformed into a chariot. Before she was aware, he took her in the chariot beside him. Over the desert, the dewdrops rained like never. When she opened her eyes, she saw him beside her forever and ever. It was raining outside.
“I love you with an everlasting love. Nothing can surpass my love, but you,” he said, while the apparitions of her perplexed thoughts and fears vapored and vanished into the clouds and rained over the deserts. It murmured how he fought them and won them. While it rained, it echoed the love of him for her. Under the burning fire of his love, she witnessed that nothing was a fantasy, either him or his love.
“My Dewdrop, do you know how ardently I admire and love you?” he asked her with all the love of him for her. Neither she nor he could live in solitude of life. They were set apart for each other by the might of universe.
The bright flame of his heart burnt with love for her echoed in her ears, “…love is strong as death, passion fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of flame. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If one offered for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly scorned.”
The leaves rustling in the breeze whispered a story. The story of a young man who sought to win her heart. A fairy tale, the prince who lost his heart to a princess. Too late he knew that she was not his princess. That her Prince Charming already came along, for her happily ever after. His intense love scorched his insides, a flaming desire. His beliefs, his thoughts, his feelings, everything fascinated her. More than love, she admired him. Yet he never gave up, incessant desire kept moving him forward. Somewhere along this road he lost his soul to a girl who would never be his own. His ineffable untainted love fascinated her, but she couldn't give him her heart. She already gave it away, to her one true love. Life is full of uncertainities, you never know who you'll fall in love with, who will capture your heart.
DeleteThe road they were travelling on forked into two. She had to make a choice, a decision that would alter the course of her life. She followed her love because she wanted to spend her life with 'him'. She made her choice. Maybe right, maybe wrong. Nonetheless, it was her choice, it was what she believed she wanted.
"It is not his abilities that maketh a man who he is, it is his choices."
Suddenly, he pulled her away from her love. His strong grasp held her hands tightly and her mouth opened in bewilderment. She knew that 'he' couldn't live without her. He pulled her into his chariot and sped away. She had to go back to 'him'. As the distance between them grew, she knew she belonged to 'him'.
"Distance makes the heart grow fonder."
When someone is taken away from you, you realise how much you need that person. The universe took 'him' away from her and she wasn't ready to give up yet.
She needed to get back to 'him', to her world. That was the only thought that crossed her mind, it consumed her. Her fear, perplexities and doubts vanished, this was the moment she figured out what she really wanted. She realised that she knew it all along. She loved 'him' so dearly that she wouldn't leave 'him' for anything in the world.
She told him, "I belong to 'him'. No matter how intensely you love me, I will love 'him', not you. Because it was a promise for a lifetime. Even death can't do us apart. Let me go. I have to go back to 'him'. I know I'm hurting you but 'he' needs me. And do you know how ardently I love and admire 'him'? As much as you love me, if not more. And 'he' loves me much more than that also."
His moist eyes tried hard to not let the tears flow. He wanted her, but she wasn't his to take. She already belonged to someone else. He loved her so much that he let her go...
Maybe he didn't find his 'happily ever after'. But she did. And he was happy for her. After all, what is love other than happiness you feel as long as the one you love is happy.
- Dewdrop (:
“I came to leave you this,”.....(follow the link below to read the rest or click on "when it rains")
Deletehttp://anandmcz.webs.com/when-it-rains