The Valentine

It was the 13th of August when I received her message, a simple note on WhatsApp:

“I was in Kannur last weekend :p”

“Coming tomorrow.”

She comes and goes, a presence that lingers yet never truly stays. Each departure, each moment of leaving, is marked by the same phrase:

“I was in Kannur :p.”

It’s her signature, an emblem that always follows her, like a shadow trailing her every move.

Why does she return to Cannanore? Is there some occasion I’m unaware of? A gathering, a celebration? The thoughts swirl like a storm in my mind. I, seeking answers, reach out to my mother, casually inquiring if there’s some event—perhaps a marriage or a family function. It was then that she revealed it.

A family friend’s engagement. (02/10/14, 03:30 PM)

I sat in silence, overwhelmed by the weight of it all.

“What is happening?” I thought, my chest tightening, each beat of my heart louder than the last.

“No… I can’t… I didn’t…”

The realization crashed over me, a wave of panic that nearly pulled me under. I tried to breathe, but the air felt thick.

“I can’t—this can’t be real. Why didn’t I see it?”

My mind raced, faster than I could control, every thought an eruption, every emotion an uncontrollable surge. I was caught in the pull of something greater than myself, a force that I couldn’t resist, no matter how hard I tried.

And then it hit me—my life, my choices, my illusions—all suspended in the balance, just like that.

I wasn’t ready for this. I wasn’t prepared for the depth of it.

I imagined the things I still wanted to do, the life I had planned to live, the places I had yet to visit, the adventures I had yet to embark on. “I can’t die like this. Not now, not for this. Not for something so trivial.”

But as the turmoil in my mind grew, I realized the truth. There was no escaping it. There was no running from what had already taken root.

I didn’t want to be consumed by the weight of it all, but somehow, it pulled me in. It’s funny how something so small—an engagement, a simple message—could unravel everything I thought I knew about myself.

In a moment of clarity, I packed my things, the weight of the decision pulling me towards action, towards her. I didn’t know what I was going to do, only that I needed to move, needed to be somewhere else. Somewhere near her.

I boarded the train, not knowing what awaited me, but knowing that in some strange way, I had to be there. She had become an enigma, a puzzle I couldn’t quite solve, and yet, she was the answer to questions I hadn’t even known to ask.

P.S. I met her.

And she said, “Curiosity killed the cat :p.”