The Ballads of Gravity

That was the moment I understood how love can silence a person. I was foolish enough, then and perhaps even now, to grasp the full weight of your question.  "Can I pretend that you are not in love with me? Just so I can speak to you. " I yearn to return and conjure a goodbye, fabricate the closure we never had.  Sometimes, I face reality in the sacred aisle of my love for you. Once, you were a concept, a missing piece that completed me, or rather, you were the spark that animated my existence.  Infinity   I will bury you somewhere deeper, somewhere far beneath the surface. I will entomb you within the layers of my own humility. I see you everywhere, radiating happiness. Happiness, with a secre t.

Do you realize the depths to which you've led me, teetering on the edge of madness born from my love to you? I've glimpsed the fine line between sanity and chaos, etched upon the shores of darkness. How naive I've been, futilely attempting to break free from the gravity of your presence. I can't blame you, for you were unaware. That day, as rain pierced my heart, your words, "leave it," echoed—acknowledging the futility and endlessness of our situation. It felt like an endless loop, with you unknowingly entwined within. Despite my efforts to break free, I found myself ensnared repeatedly. Eventually, I surrendered, letting time take its course. In one final attempt to sever the ties, we met. There, amidst the chaos, I witnessed the universe aligning, revealing the intricacies of fate. I watched myself detach, fading into the background as he tenderly kissed the delicate curve of your neck—a sacred moment etched by destiny, binding us for eternity. As if in

Ruth, you graced this expanse of sands, and it was here that our paths converged. In those days, you took the form of a black bird, a creature I sculpted from the very stones of the desert. Like the ever-shifting dunes, you moved with a constant and mesmerizing pattern, a desert woman with the ability to whisper the secrets of the sands and summon wild winds from your flowing locks, capable of lifting mountains. You waged a relentless battle against the sun, your beauty ravishing and merciless, captivating the desert men with your enigmatic words and mysterious eyes. How could I not fall in love with you? Your eyes, profound and mysterious, resembled pools of liquid obsidian, holding secrets within their depths. Your movements mirrored the graceful fluidity of the shifting sand dunes. You embody the spirit of the desert—fierce, unforgiving, yet endlessly captivating. As the wind began to pick up, swirling grains of sand into frenzied eddies, and the sun beat down with unyielding intens

When someone is taken away from you, you realise how much you need that person. The universe took 'him' away from her and she wasn't ready to give up yet. She needed to get back to 'him', to her world. That was the only thought that crossed her mind, it consumed her. Her fear, perplexities and doubts vanished, this was the moment she figured out what she really wanted. She realised that she knew it all along. She loved 'him' so dearly that she wouldn't leave 'him' for anything in the world.  She told him, "I belong to 'him'. No matter how intensely you love me, I will love 'him', not you. Because it was a promise for a lifetime. Even death can't do us apart. Let me go. I have to go back to 'him'. I know I'm hurting you but 'he' needs me. And do you know how ardently I love and admire 'him'? As much as you love me, if not more. And 'he' loves me much more than that also. ” His moist eyes

The leaves rustling in the breeze whispered a story. The story of a young man who sought to win her heart. A fairy tale, the prince who lost his heart to a princess. Too late he knew that she was not his princess. That her Prince Charming already came along, for her happily ever after. His intense love scorched his insides, a flaming desire. His beliefs, his thoughts, his feelings, everything fascinated her. More than love, she admired him. Yet he never gave up, incessant desire kept moving him forward.  Somewhere along this road he lost his soul to a girl who would never be his own. His ineffable untainted love fascinated her, but she couldn't give him her heart. She already gave it away, to her one true love. Life is full of uncertainities, you never know who you'll fall in love with, who will capture your heart.  The road they were travelling on forked into two. She had to make a choice, a decision that would alter the course of her life. She followed her love because she wa

At every corner, she glimpsed him. Through the mist, she saw his figure, looking at her, the love in his eyes never fading. She tightened her grip on 'his' hand, her love, and glanced back. Sometimes she wonders, was it true? What he believed in. Whether she was his princess. But, she lost that moment. And she lived in her present, and the past, a mirage. Nothing could change her love for 'him'. She looked into 'his' eyes and all her inhibitions disappeared. She didn't hear the soft crunch of leaves behind her. She was too occupied with her love, her beliefs, with 'him'. She didn't see him steal glances at her. And sometimes, he lost her again, in the mist, in the blur, in the obscurity.  But he always found her, for his love for her burned in his heart, a bright flame. She gave him the key to his freedom, but he flung it away. He chose his way of life, he wanted to chase her forever. He would never give up. His incessant pursuit fascinated her,

“But..” Her lips quivered, feelings clouded her mind. She loved him dearly and wouldn't do anything to give him up, his love, his care. When he came into her life, she was reborn, a new energy coursing through her veins. Every day started with his presence, his warmth. His hug that protected her, she felt at home. His insane possessivenes that made him keep her close. She couldn't even consider leaving him. Her existance revolved around him. She dreamt up a world that consisted of only both of them. She painted her life in his colours, bright and happy. And now, after all this time, he comes into my life, the invisible part of my being. He kissed her, giving her new life and hope, but she slowly pushed him away. She didn't want a new life, she was happy with her life. A shadow of despair crossed his face, and she was shattered. She didn't want to hurt him, he who has always been there for her. She just wanted him to be there for her, as her friend. She took his fist in

She is a free bird, soaring in the endless azure sky. She let herself go, no strings holding her back, from a world that wouldn't accept her. She didn't want to wallow in self pity, drown herself in the misery. She wanted to be happy. She didn't need a world that ceased to exist for her.  In the darkness, a ray of s unshine reached out to her. Her cynical self turned away but the soothing hand pulled her out of her fantasy world. His smile brought her back to life. A loving touch, his honey coloured eyes that burned with intense love. His presense sustained her, she thrived on his love. She soared across the skies with her love by her side, not alone. Too late she knew that she was never alone, loneliness was never her ally. The one who loved her while she was too busy in her own fantasies and troubles, never abandoned her. He was always there, next to her, but she never noticed.  Now, she was encased in the feathers of her loved one, in her safe haven. He was still next to

WE danced till the world slipped into an oblivion of our presence.  WE drank wine till the sun turned black.   WE forgot who we were and transformed into the purest form of creation.  I knew, then, I died and reincarnated into all of your desires, happiness, sorrows, fears, ecstasy, and forms of beings.  “Where will you find me after?” your lips quivered.  “You are everywhere” I said.   

“Nam Sibyllam quidem Cumis ego ipse oculis meis vidi in ampulla pendere, et cum illi pueri dicerent: Sibylla ti theleis; respondebat illa: apothanein thelo.” Have I forgotten you? I don't like the way you faded into oblivion. Your glorious absence marveled at the absurdities of my life. Even the last remnants of your weird sight and smile create a whirlpool of the past and a hurricane of madness deep in the abyss of my conscience. Everywhere, in every form and matter, I see your dust. I teach myself to forget you and move ahead. The chaos of your story in mine is the absence of your existence in time-space. I weave each and every layer of your story so that I can tell my son, one day, how I survived on my own. I wonder whether it was your light or the shadow I painted, mostly in Prussian blue. They will hear the echoes of the deep enchanting chasm on my chest. I keep it echoing on my chest, so that I might tell my son on the shores of infinity that I had a story to tell.

In the abyss of the Origin, a soul whispered its destiny through the chaos, finding poetry in the delicate dance of a butterfly's wing. Ad infinitum, it was arranged for the chaotic perfection of the mighty unknown, formed by the energy in the quantum architecture of the universe. It neither had a beginning nor an end but represented a continuation of time across multiple dimensions. Every atomic energy of every existing and non-existing organism, in every possible and impossible algorithm of human calculation and beyond the horizon of intelligence, found life in that single cell. It wasn't a mere beginning or end but a singular entity branching into myriad derivations while maintaining the essence of the One. There existed only one true existence, and the others were mere reflections of the One. I witnessed her and myself in the unimaginable unity of multiple dimensions, being both singular and multiple simultaneously. Neither light nor sound could escape the chaotic perfectio

I ought to have maintained my anonymity until the denouement, for it is there that our prospects would have thrived most auspiciously upon the uncharted horizon of the unknown.  The mere possibility of your transformation into the conjured metabolism of pataphysical existence weighed heavily upon my heart and mind as never before. I unwittingly ensnared myself in the role of a semi-demi doppelganger of Ulysses, thus sowing the seeds of my life's sabotage. I would occasionally catch fleeting glimpses of grace in the glimmer of a wondrous, age-old ruin of impeccable provenance. Through the enchantment of that ancient relic, I sustained the illusion of your presence with a kind of marvelous grace.  Yet, as I struggled to regain my aesthetic maneuverability, I found myself compelled to make a sacrificial offering of your memory upon the altar of the immutable cosmological constants.  I carry you with me to my tomb, and perhaps even beyond, for you persist within me, omnipresent in

I've undergone a transformation beyond my wildest imaginings.  There comes a point in everyone's life where letting go becomes a necessity for forward movement. Losing something seems inherent to gaining something else—some do it by choice, while time enforces it on others.  In my case, the catalyst was the cat's curiosity. Though time played its part, comprehending and visualizing the entirety of my 'glorious past' remains a struggle. While I acknowledge its irretrievability, I occasionally entertain fantastical notions of time reversal in the quantum realm. There's solace in sipping coffee on the beach, the waves' soothing cadence offering a picturesque recapitulation of time, patterns in space, and gravity's pained dance. That marked the end of one era and the commencement of another. Ruth, the ROOH, my muse and the architect of my existence—credit for all that I became and everything I did not, goes to her timeline interwoven with mine. She sculpted

I found myself on a trail, seeking the vestiges of stardust's lingering memories. Perhaps, my curiosity was drawn to the pain it once bore in the crucible of gravity. They say fortune smiles when your star aligns with you. Intrigued by this celestial promise, I would pray and tilt my head skyward, gazing at the descent of stars, yearning for one to cross my path. Testing destiny's hand with each falling star became a ritual for me.  It was a shepherd boy who revealed me the tale of a rare falling star—a crimson diamond giant. He spoke of an unprecedented sight in his nocturnal wanderings, beneath the suspended lanterns of the sky. As a child, I marveled at the expansive night sky from the sturdy shoulders of my father. Now, no longer that inquisitive child, I gaze back, contemplating the innocence I once held.  Time flowed like a nocturnal train through the shadowy woods, and I matured.  I was a young poet desperately trying to take off from the gravity of my existence. I know

“ഞാന് ‍ എന്റെ ചോരകൊണ്ട് വാക്കുകള് ‍ നനക്കുന്നു . എന്റെ ചോരയില് ‍ ചരിത്രത്തിന്റെ ചാരം അലിഞ്ഞിട്ടുണ്ട് . അതില് ‍ ഇന്നിന്റെ ധര് ‍ മ്മസങ്കടങ്ങളുണ്ട് . നാളയുടെ ഉത്കണ്ഠകളുണ്ട് . കവിയുടെ ചങ്കില് ‍ കിനിയുന്ന ചോരയുടെ ഗന് ‍ ധമുണ്ടാകണം കവിതക്ക് . അപ്പൊഴേ ഒരു വേനല് ‍ മഴ പോലെ നമ്മുടെ നെഞ്ചുപൊള്ളിക്കാന് ‍ കവിതക്കാകൂ .” ( എ അയ്യപ്പൻ ഓർമകളിലൂടെ ) അയ്യപ്പാ , നിന്റെ ചുണ്ടിൽ എരിഞ്ഞടങ്ങിയ ബീഡിയും , നിന്നെ നുകർന്ന റമ്മും പ്രേതമായി ഇവിടുണ്ട് സഖാവെ . നിന്റെ ചങ്ക് കീറി , നീ പെറ്റ നിന്റെ വാക്കുകൾ കാറ്റിന്റെ ശബ്ദമായി അലയടിക്കുന്നുണ്ടിവിടെ . പാതി പറഞ്ഞുവെച്ച   കഥകളും , പാതിയാക്കി നിർത്തിയ കവിതകളും നിനക്കായി കാത്തിരിക്കുന്നുണ്ടിവിടെ . നീ കാറ്റായും , മഴയായും , തിരയായും പിന്നെ നിന്റെ പ്രണയമായ വെയിലായും മാറുക . നീ പോയതിൽ പിന്നെ വെയിലിനു തണുപ്പാണ് സഖാവെ , നിന്റെ മണ്ടയിൽ പെരുകിയ ജീവിതങ്ങൾ , ചരിത്രങ്ങൾ , കാമ മോഹങ്ങൾ , രതിയും മരണവും , പ്രണയവും പട്ടിണിയും പിന്നെ അവളും നീയും ... ഞാൻ പോയി ഇരിക്കാറുണ്ട് ആ ആൽച്ചുവട്ടിൽ , കടൽ തീരങ്ങളിൽ , നഗരവീഥികളിൽ നിന്നെ

"But..."  I was being dragged by the ebb of time into the abyss. On the shores, beneath the mountains, blue waters lulled my feet. I was looking at the completion of my life as she was calling me to join the tides.  The gravity of the past pulled me into the quantum architecture of multiple dimensions of life. I fell into the realms where I tricked my past to stay engaged. My present is an analogy of my past. The energy I created, then, in the quantum architecture transformed into an autonomous being of intelligence. I was unable to stop it from growing into a being. They said, "Quantum corresponds to each other and can transfer information to each other, no matter of space or time." Her lips quivered, and her feelings clouded her mind as she appeared like a glitch in time. Her words echoed through the ages, " We should remain ignorant of each other like we used to be in the past. I will pretend that I never knew you." P.S: Spenser read from his book, &

In the quiet solitude of my thoughts, I found an unusual delight in loving someone oblivious to my existence. It was a pleasure that defied the conventional bounds of connection, surpassing the limits of form, substance, and cognition. The question of "How I defined her" remained a nuanced exploration, a constant journey through the corridors of my evolving understanding of love. Lost in contemplation, I gently closed my eyes, allowing the canvas of my imagination to come alive. A fleeting smile graced my lips, a silent tribute to the vivid images painted by my mind. As my eyes slowly reopened, a sigh escaped, betraying the futile attempt to banish her from my thoughts. She was like a breath of fresh air, akin to the early morning dew—persistent, refreshing, and impossible to shake off. No matter how diligently I tried to divert my mind, her thoughts persisted, a relentless night train traversing the dark woods of my consciousness, illuminating my entire existence. In lovi

Back in the days of my youth, I was just a boy when I first encountered her. She had this incredible ability to make me dream. As time unfurled its wings, I transformed into a man, and it was during this transition that she initiated what I came to call the ghost protocol. Between the innocence of boyhood and the responsibilities of manhood, she molded me into a poet.  She entered my life like a sudden burst of sunlight, and just as swiftly as she appeared, she vanished, leaving me with the echoes of her presence. I called her Ruth. Looking back, I realize that something went awry, and it all traces back to the moment when I met her. A meeting I shouldn't have allowed. But, as they say, bygones are bygones, and now I yearn to forge ahead. The desert, my current abode, is a peculiar place. It is both spiritual and draining, affecting me in ways I struggle to comprehend. Whether it transforms me into a sage or a wealthy man, leads me to an early demise, or grants me a long life, one

Every day unfolds as a dance of atoms and molecules, a delicate inversion in the quantum realm. Ruth grappled with the self-destruction and regeneration encoded in the unknown, unable to digest the complexities. Meanwhile, my preoccupation lay in normalizing inversions on the outer layer of life—a reality perceived within the common understanding and the illusions that accompany it. To escape the constant barrage of human emotions, I explored the persistent inversion and manipulation of dimensions. This exploration aimed to create an expansive realm of unstable, undecipherable equations, where events and existence intertwine, untouched by the mundane. Dislocation from the usual choreography of conscious opera led to an alienation that opened a rabbit hole toward the world within and within. Expectation, I realized, was the root of every trouble, an insidious force that could unravel the finest forms of joy. The understanding of the quantum unveiled the ephemeral nature of our existenc

Rage, rage, rage! Rage unto the roaring skies and rob the mighty waves of light; And sound the clash of Titans. Bring me them in the arc, I shall drink them to the less. Ah, my Angels and Devils,  Rage unto the eternal fire and waters, I shall blow the west wind and chariot unto the Eastern skies. I carry the unquenched fire and sound the trumpet of war. They devoured Prometheus's liver, Defiled Hypatia upon Caesareum's altar, Stripped by oyster shells, Bathed in the blood of Jesus, the Nazarene. I bury them. Yes, I bury them. I see the reversal of the time-  Those who walk on land shall return to their origin. The slave of the past, Bearer of forefathers' sins, Shed your blood, find solace in your shadows, As they demand the return of your sins.           Show me your hands           For, they drop blood            and wipe the stains of sins they passed on to you,          For,  They never say enough and enough.